Tag Archives: single mum by choice

The Final Countdown

Last Gonal-f injection – tick

Triggering (Pregnyl) injection – tick

Fasting from midnight tonight – under control, I’ll be asleep

FYI – Pregnyl apparently completes the maturation of the eggs, and if the weird feelings I have been experiencing in my belly today are anything to go by, it’s doing its job. “Weird feelings” kinda just feel like trapped wind, but it’s in the general vicinity, so I presume it’s my ovaries warming up.

I’ve had an ear-to-ear grin all day. Work colleagues very concerned – “I hope everything’s ok”, “Hope it goes well” + worried looks and so they are probably wondering why I am so chirpy about the prospect of going into hospital.

I am glad this process is over though (remember the mantra – pregnant first time). It’s taxing in ways that are hard to explain, difficult to pinpoint.

Some are easy to to work out – the physically taxing:

  • The drive to the clinic is 45 minutes to an hour on a good day, nearly an hour and a half on a bad day. Yesterday I went twice – four hours in the car.
  • The injections – have I done it right? Have I missed one (despite having the alarm set on my phone)? There were a few days when I almost forgot whether I had done it at all.
  • The side effects, though minor, have left me feeling not great. Not completely awful, just not in fabulous, tip-top condition.
The emotionally taxing – not so easy to figure out.
Because I am not in a relationship, I have not been trying to fall pregnant forever. This is the first time I have ever tried. I can’t imagine the amount of emotional stress some couples have found themselves dealing with in this process, because I guess for them this process is the end of a long road, and the start of a new road. A road which may or may not be as long and arduous as the last.
But for me – well I suppose it has been a long road to get here, I just travelled it differently.
Then I guess there’s:
  • The worry about the expense of it all – not so much the expense, but the expense¬†if it didn’t work. What then? $10,000-odd for nothing?
  • The secrecy at work – I’ve only been there 9 months, lost my job when the last financial kerfuffle hit, and really cannot, CANNOT, lose this one. Especially now.
  • The breathless anticipation, mixed with a tinge of what-if-it-doesn’t-work.
  • The injections again – on the plus side, you feel like you are doing something positive, taking action to achieve your dreams, but all that excitement is physically and emotionally exhausting!
And so here we are, T-minus 18 hours. My friend is coming over tonight to take me to hospital in the morning – we have an early start so we’re having a slumber party! Usually similar such get togethers would involve alcohol (plenty), but tonight it will be herbal tea.
Ha – and I’ve just realised I’m getting all excited about the harvest, when the real deal will be on Saturday, when they put them back in – this time fertilised! So it’s T-minus 4 days, but what’s a few days pregnant with anticipation (pardon the pun) between friends huh?!
(Yes, I changed the look. This is more me.)

1 Comment

Filed under ART, IVF, pregnant over 40, sperm donor