It’s been a while…

It has indeed been a while between posts, I do apologise. And I’m only writing now because I thought i’d look at what i’d already written and because I’d spoke to a few friends about the fact that I had started a blog… What do you call a blog-when-you-can-be-arsed? Lazy? Mainly worried that I don;t have anyhting to say I think is the main reason I haven’t posted, but of course I have lots to say. inane a lot of it but lots just the same

Anyway. Am going to Perth for Christmas. Which I’m looking forward to for the novelty value of going to a place which is ostensibly my home town, but which I haven’t lived in for 20 years. i do have friends there, some of whom I’d love to see. of course I have family. And right now all I can think of is the last time I saw one of my aunts, only a few months ago, she was ribbing my brother and I about our dual failure to reproduce. She jokingly said, oh come on , get a move on! I won’t worry about you, Michelle, you’re too old!

And didn’t that make me feel wonderful! Oh yes. I love being reminded of how I have failed. it’s quite incredible that people don’t realise that sometimes things aren’t a conscious choice. It was not my conscious choice to be single and childless – far from it. This is just the way it is. And right now at 1am, just a week from xmas,  it’s pretty painful.

Well ain’t this a downer. So I’ll finish here.

Drinking: Of course I’m fucking drinking. Xabregas Mt Baker Cabernet Merlot, followed by Cointreau. Followed by… well, I’ll probably stop here and go to bed.

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